Much of how I am made up as a person and the lessons I’m meant to learn in this lifetime have to do with the duality of being a human. I see both sides of things. I waffle in decision making, infrequently feeling like I’ve made the “right” choice until after the experience has played out and I’ve seen some piece of evidence that confirms my path. Most of the time, my Gemini ass is all over the place, anxiety ruling the day. Trying to map out each choice in my head before I ever really jump in completely. Compound that with other aspects of my personality and the additional fact that I am currently in a personal year of 11 or 2 in numerology, and you will begin to see why I can’t even pick what I want to wear some days, let alone a partner or a job. In numerology, the number 2 vibration is all about choice and decision making. Allow me to share with you my discovery thus far in this intense year.
JUST PICK SOMETHING, DAMNIT!!!!!!!!!! LOL, but seriously……in our culture and society of 8 million choices, the biggest dilemma is that we never really choose. We will date multiples, we will half-ass it at work or in our many other endeavors. In short, we fear failure, hurt or disappointment if we give our all to something and it fails. But what exactly is failure? The ending of something? The outcome not looking how we imagined it to be? Not necessarily. If we experience something and give it our all, that is enough. The Universe is not results driven. It doesn’t care if you get married to that guy or date for a few months. The Universe sees the progress and the growth from the scene that is playing out. Time is the great illusion; our souls live on and on for centuries. If we don’t experience something to its satisfaction this lifetime, guess what!??? We’ll get to repeat it next go around. But also, simply surviving an experience or situation is enough. Each time we live through an experience, we learn and we grow. But if we never really commit, we are just going through the motions, and end up not really enjoying ourselves. Instead, our brain is trying to negotiate and manipulate to help us in avoiding pain. We miss out on the full experience because we’re not in the present moment. And, I’ve got news for you sugarplum– Life is filed pain and suffering, much of which is our own doing.
It’s not really the experience or the other person that brings the pain but instead our own thoughts, fears, beliefs and hang-ups that create the most angst in our lives. It boils down to trusting yourself enough to make a decision, your ability to stick with it and to move forward to the next opportunity. To wish the other party the very best and to leave them feeling good about the interaction and the experience. Why do we need to make the other person the bad guy? We can also find ourselves not moving on quickly enough because we’re afraid we won’t find anything better. Many of us stay in situations that don’t fully resonate with us, because we don’t think there is anything better for us on the horizon. Making a choice and deciding requires that you love yourself enough to move away from things that don’t fulfill you. The Universe rewards us when we take the leap of faith and leave spaces in our lives to be filled. Think of it this way, you’re not gonna get your dream relationship until you LOVINGLY release the guy or gal who is taking up that energetic space in this moment. Holding on to them out of fear is not fair to you or them. Trust that you can handle the empty spaces. Trust that you can trust your decisions. Trust that the U has your back. Loves ya’ll!