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When romance ends

Starting out a connection with someone can be exciting, passionate, playful and full of possibility. New love can put a pep in our step and help to bring excitement to everyday life. We get lit up when we hear from them or see them, filling away encounters and communication for future enjoyment. But sometimes for a variety of reasons, things have to end quicker than we would like.


When this happens, we can go from the high of all the endorphins and pleasure and plumet straight into grief and heartbreak. Perhaps we had high hopes for things to move forward. Or maybe we were just really digging the other person. No matter the situation, changing from all the highs straight into all the lows can be quite an adjustment. When this happens, it can be easy to want to rush through the sadness, pain and regret. It is uncomfortable and not really all that enjoyable. It can be hard to find things to look forward to in your life, or you can find yourself reminiscing over every little moment you had with the person, wondering where things went wrong.


But just like love and joy, the seemingly opposite emotions of grief, sadness and regret can offer us so much. In these moments, our hearts are breaking open to allow an even greater amount of love into our lives. This love may not come immediately but in a lot of ways, it will if we allow it to. In these times, we can lean on friends, family and the support we have in our lives. We can deepen our connection with Spirit, ourselves, our children, our pets, or we can cultivate new or old hobbies, or revisit our dreams or desires.


We can also be open to what the situation taught us by entering our lives in the first place. Again, this can be an uncomfortable place to be, but this phase of inquiry can bring so much expansion in our lives. Maybe asking ourselves questions like,


*What did I learn from this person or connection?

*What could I improve on in the future in my relationships?

*What about this person did I really like or appreciate that I would either like to cultivate in myself or manifest in a future partner?

*How were my boundaries during this connection; were my needs met? If not, how can I work on this before another potential partner comes in?


So, if you are catching this message, I just want to offer you some small piece of hope. Love is still available to you, even if it doesn't feel so in this moment. Even through the loneliness, the heartbreak, the questioning, and even the pain, there is still so much beauty all around you. Allow yourself the tears, the regret, the sadness, anger, frustration - whatever it is that you're feeling. Because someday soon, all of this will pass and again you will feel more love than you ever thought possible. And at some point, the cycle will probably start all over again.


Much love, Robin



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